Monday, January 4, 2010

Forgiveness and True Repentance

I am the survivor of abuse. I am no longer the victim.


Do I forgive my abuser? Yes I do… Do I still see this person? No I don’t.


Was I ostracized because I walked away from the situation? Yes I was.


Why? You may ask. …. The reason, … many Christians believe forgive means to forget and continue to live with an (EVIL) person.




I am a Christian and struggled with the concept of what I should do for years. After all I reasoned, didn’t I myself hurt others at times requiring forgiveness also…… and didn’t Jesus say, “Forgive 77x7.” So what is the difference with me being forgiven, and what the other person continued to do? Good question.


The answer comes from Gods Word on REPENTANCE.


Matthew 3:8 “Bring forth therefore fruits, meet with repentance.”


Other scriptures on repentance: Matt 3:2. Acts 20:21 2Peter 3:9.




So did the other person ask me or God for forgiveness? The answer is NO!


Yet, there are many (so called) Christians who abuse and ask forgiveness of their victim. And they expect that forgiveness over and over.


This is done to turn the abuse from themselves, back onto the person they abuse.


They don’t wish to STOP! They want to continue what they are doing. They justify their actions by making the other person believe they are the one in the wrong.


(As in incest (children obey your parents) and spousal abuse (wives be subject to your husband).


They don’t want their act declared in the LIGHT. And no one suspects what is going , on behind closed doors.




When the perpetrator continues to hurt another, using clever manipulation to get their own way, then they do not display the fruits of repentance.


If this is the case, God is not their Father.


No!…..Satan transformed as an angel of light, is their Father, (2 Corinthians 11:14).


As Christians we are not to be involved with such persons. Jesus gives His example on this…...


In Matthew 4:10. Jesus deals with Satan when Satan conveniently turns scripture around to suit himself.


Jesus DOES NOT! Allow Satan to get away with his liars! Instead he rebukes him, and sends him away………using The Word of God


Physical, Mental, Emotional and Verbal Abuse ……Penetrates and Wounds the Soul!


“You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free! (John 8:31 )



My Home Garden of Happiness.

4 comments:

  1. I really like the picture at the end of this post. Very lovely!

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  2. Abuse victims I've known consistently say verbal and psychological abuse is worse than physical. Bruises heal but the damage to self-esteem is more difficult to overcome. Forgiveness is a theme that comes up a lot when Christians discuss abuse and I sometimes wonder if talking about forgiveness isn't a way of avoiding talking about the abuse, instead. Once a person is on the way to recovery, then they can think about whether or not or even how to forgive and what that means. But in the beginning, I think leaving it to God and working on getting better, feeling better about oneself, and being grateful to have survived ought to take precendence. What do you think?

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  3. What you say is very good!... I think we are all individuals and as such deal with those who hurt us in different ways. Yes, healing does take time, A LIFE TIME...and it does depend on the abused, as to how and when they may feel able to forgive. And YES! the healing needs to be encouraged first.
    Forgiveness is a self healer, it helps one to let go....and in the process "let God."(deal with it)! The scars of emotional and mental abuse do linger longer!ABSOLUTELY! However, the bruising to the soul when you are hit in the face with a heavy opened hand effects the emotions also, tearing down any self esteem until the self is lost. I speak out in this article and declare I was physically, emotionally mentally and sexually abused. I feel whole now 16 yrs on, for being able to say this and take a stand.Hopefully someone may be helped by my testimony.
    It's the tender hearted who are abused...by bullies that elevate themselves (in their own eyes) to a fake superior privileged position...
    Thank you for your sensitive contribution Bill.
    God bless you!

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  4. Hello Joyful, Thank you for visiting. Gardens are so wonderful. From a patch of dirt beauty can bloom. God gave us a minute glimpse of Heaven by gardens. May He bless you abundantly.

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